NUMB


Numb

Not a great place to be

Numb

Wrapped in bubble wrap

Attempting to avoid the pain

Numb

An anesthetic that flows through one’s veins

Yet, this protection comes at a price

Deaden the emotions, try not to feel

Pain is avoided but so too are joy,

bliss, happiness, awe, wonder

All blanketed in the soft swirling fog

Pain is held at bay, at arm’s length

Thinking that one’s strength is dependent

 on the anesthetic of numbness

But it steals one’s ability to love fully,

 laugh joyously,

live courageously

Numb

Homelessness and Hunger


blown down barn

Is God trying to reach me? I don’t know if there have been divine signs or if it’s my natural proclivity to be drawn to people in need, but I have been noticing more often than usual the stories of hardship, homelessness, poverty, and hunger – and not only the physical, but the spiritual as well. Yesterday I was one of many listening to a presentation from a local organization that is doing its best to face the twin challenges of homelessness and mental illness. Last night I chanced to watch a documentary on television called, “God knows where I am” about a homeless woman who starved to death due to mental illness that prevented her from reaching out for help.

I want to help people. But I have no idea how to do so. So, I write it out. To hold all the pain I perceive in others is just too much sometimes. So, I hope you will forgive me. I do try to share positive messages, I really do. So, I am going to try to flip the switch now.

There are things we can do as individuals such as donating to food banks, being kind to one another, sometimes really simple small acts can and do make a difference. There is a woman who comes sporadically into the library, where I work,  but over the years I have come to know her a little. She is a single mother of a large family. I often chat with her a bit and I am always so glad to see her. I don’t know her well, but I know she has had a lot of challenges in life. In 2016 Fort McMurray was evacuated due to wildfires and it was several months before I saw her again. She was one of many people I often thought about and prayed for. I was delighted when I finally did see her again. She fairly threw herself across the desk to give me a hug when I did. I was so grateful she was okay. And, I was happy, so happy. Of course, I hugged her back. Perhaps the time I spend with her is of little consequence, but I like to think it may make a difference in her hard life.

Life is hard, too hard for many people. I think the smiles we offer are important, time spent, if only a few minutes with people who are lonely and in need of kindness, is important. It costs us nothing, but can make a world of difference to people in need – and we are ALL in need sometimes.

God, if you are trying to reach me, You have. Now, please, grant me wisdom and grant me courage to do all I can to honor and help my sisters and brothers. They are yours. But they are also mine. Be with me as I try; and be with me when I fail. Help me to be gentle with myself and with others – always!

Questioning the Moon


MOON resized

Peeking through the cloud cover

Witnessing life on earth

Earth’s faithful companion

Orbiting through space

Were you there, Sister Moon

When life first formed?

Did you watch as the first creature

Crawled slowly from the sea?

In your ever-lasting cycle,

in your orbit around our world

Did you witness the dinosaurs

As they prowled the hills and plains?

Did your winking face gaze down upon

The planet and can you tell us why

All life on earth was wiped out

As cold air masses froze the land?

Oh, ancient wonder in the sky

What drama have you witnessed

What stories could you tell

Of all the changes

On this, our blue-green planet

That you follow faithfully

Sister Moon, do tell us

Advise us if you can

On how to save the planet

This jewel of blue and green

That humans have made obscene

Garbage in our oceans

Choking off all life

Pollution on all fronts:

Land and sea, and sky

Oh, beauty of the night

Tell us if you please

How can we save our planet?

Our home, our heart, our life force

For we need your wisdom

We are lost, we have forsaken

The knowledge of our forebears

Remind us now

How fragile

Life truly is

And let us find better ways

To live upon this miracle

Bashed and Broken


Broken BOAT resized

When you are broken

Like a boat dashed upon the shore

In stormy weather

When it feels you are naught but wreckage

And only a remnant of your self remains

When your surface has been worn down

By angry waves that toss you about

Like a ship upon the sea

When life has scraped and bruised you

And you feel you can’t go on

When your heart is torn and heavy

And the burdens weigh you down

Hold close this thought:

Nothing lasts forever

Not good times,

Not bad times.

Let hope rise up within you

For this, too, shall pass

And lessons learned in the valley

Will come to your aid one day

I pray that soon

Your suffering will cease

And once again you will feel

Sweet peace

Lessons in the Deluge


“Out of massive suffering emerged the strongest souls; the most massive characters are seared with scars.” – Khalil Gibran

When I was a little girl we lived in rural Newfoundland. In the back of the field beautiful sunflowers grew tall and I loved them. So, this spring I decided to plant sunflowers of two different heights in the corner of the back yard. The seed packets read that some will grow to be as tall as 3.5 metres (approximately 9 feet) and the others would grow about 2 feet tall. I had this vision of how the flowers would look with the high board fence behind them as I planted them. Unfortunately, mother nature delivered a punishing rain on the weekend and the deluge caused flooding in parts of town. In my garden some of my sunflowers took a beating and are now bent over as if the weight of the rain was too much to bear. I spent the past hour propping them up and tying them off with fishing line in an effort to support them.

I cannot help but think how people are like that. Some people grow stronger when tested by life. Others need supports until they can gain their feet and their strength. We are, each of us, individuals. Some of us are much more resilient than others. I hope that there are helpers for those that need it. I hope that whether we are the ones reaching out, or the ones offering assistance, that we each find the strength we need, whatever life may dole out.

“It’s your reaction to adversity, not adversity itself that determines how your life’s story will develop.” – Dieter F. Uchtdorf

“The best people possess a feeling for beauty, the courage to take risks, the discipline to tell the truth, the capacity for sacrifice. Ironically, their virtues make them vulnerable; they are often wounded, sometimes destroyed.” – Ernest Hemingway

On the road to redemption


ROAD 2 ALTERED

On the road to redemption

You may experience pain like –

Like falling on an upturned glass bottle that is broken and jagged,

That gashes deep into your skin and bone

Tearing tendons and ripping away sinew

 

On the road to redemption

You may be rejected, vilified, and tormented

And that will hurt you, rob you of much-needed rest

As your thoughts tumble one after another

Like a cascade of frothing water

And you may feel unable to stop the leak

That drips incessantly and poisons your days

Like a dam full of holes

You may feel like you’re drowning – but you won’t

 

On the road to redemption

You may experience loss and grief

A death perhaps, or the tearing away of a life you thought was assured

A change that forces you to re-examine all you once held dear

And leaves you questioning your sanity

And your equilibrium

As your life spins out of control on some kind of crazy tilted axle

Until you barely know which way is up or which is down

 

On the road to redemption

You will be tested, time and time again

Your character will be formed as lessons are learned

As you are baptized in fire –

A fire that you think will consume you – but it won’t

 

On the road to redemption

You may be tortured by life, but –

Look for the helpers and they will appear

They will pour sweet balm upon your soul

And plant peace deep within your heart and mind

A peace that leaves you rested and healed

A peace ‘beyond understanding’

On the road to redemption

From where will come


From where will come

A helping hand for

Stooped shoulders

Too weary to carry on

Muscled arms too weak to lift

The burden carried too long

Hushed lips

That speak no more

Words failed

To move hardened hearts

And the mouth that once sweetly sang

Silenced

 

From where will come

New strength, new hope

Eyes downcast

Spirit broken

Hope lost

Heart broken

 

From where will come

A heart to love and understand

Abandoned and forgotten

The child of war and poverty

Kneels alone

From where will come

Helping hands